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I've just watched Rio 2 today. I think that if I decide to review it, it will probably be a TOUGH one to review. Not for being terrible (the film is NOT terrible :phew: ) but it's just..... complicated. ^^; A mixed bag. Would anyone like me to review it? 

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My next review will be for one of my favourite films of all time - The Artist. :film: Any thoughts to donate? :aww: 

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Please sign this petition - TTP, something possibly worse than SOPA, will be put into action unless this petition gets the votes it needs. :fear: 

Duckyworth's Thoughts

My personal thoughts on films that I have seen!

Bram Stoker's Dracula - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
Those Magnificent Men In Their Flying Machines or How I Flew From London to Paris in 25 Hours and 11 Minutes - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Saludos Amigos and The Three Caballeros - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Watership Down - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Coraline - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Home on the Range -duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Adventures of Tintin: The Secret of The Unicorn - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Rio - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Elephant Man - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Dude, Where's My Car? - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Last Unicorn - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Return to Oz - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Rock and Rule - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Neverending Story - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Dead Space Downfall - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Nosferatu (1922) - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Exorcist - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Blair Witch Project - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Evil Dead - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Evil Dead 2 - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Army of Darkness - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
An American Werewolf In London - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Ginger Snaps - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Dog Soldiers - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Haunting (1963) - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
THEM! - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Frankenweenie (2012) - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Theatre of Blood - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
A Clockwork Orange - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Vuk The Little Fox - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Kis Vuk-A Fox's Tale - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
The Room - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Felidae - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
9 - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Plague Dogs - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Skyfall - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Flight Before Christmas -duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
The Nightmare Before Christmas - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
It's A Wonderful Life - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Lord of the Rings - The Fellowship of the Ring - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Lord of the Rings - The Two Towers - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Lord of the Rings - Return of the King - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Hobbit - An Unexpected Journey - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Secret of NIMH - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pippi Longstocking (1997) - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
The Black Cauldron - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Top Cat (2011) - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Land Before Time - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Wild - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (THE WORST FILM EVER!!)
Mario Puzo's The Godfather - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pee Wee's Big Adventure - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Robocop - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Spongebob Squarepants Movie - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Wreck-It Ralph - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Princess Mononoke - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Quest For Camelot - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
Ed Wood - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
FernGully - The Last Rainforest - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Where The Wild Things Are - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pan's Labyrinth - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Twilight - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
Help! I'm A Fish - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Corpse Bride - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Tron - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Cool World - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
Cats Don't Dance - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Secret of Kells - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Titan A.E. - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Cat In The Hat - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
The Reef - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
Balto - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokemon The First Movie: Mewtwo Strikes Back - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon 2000: The Power of One - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon 3: Entei - Spell of the Unown - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon 4Ever: Celebi - Voice of the Forest - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon Heroes - Latios and Latias - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon - Jirachi Wishmaker - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon - Destiny Deoxys - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
Pokémon Lucario and The Mystery of Mew - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon Ranger and the Temple of the Sea - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon - The Rise of Darkrai - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
Pokémon - Giratina and the Sky Warrior - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon - Arceus and the Jewel of Life - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon - Zoroark Master of Illusions - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon Black - Victini and Reshiram - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon - Kyurem Vs. The Sword of Justice - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Pokémon - Mewtwo Returns - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Brave - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Valiant - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
Rise of the Guardians - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Legend of the Guardians: Owls of Ga'Hoole (BAD FILM) REVISITED - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
An American Tail - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Dark Crystal - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Monsters University - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Monsters Inc - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Tron Legacy - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
All Dogs Go To Heaven - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Basil the Great Mouse Detective - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Häxan: Witchcraft Through The Ages - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Hotel Transylvania - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
ParaNorman - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Little Shop of Horrors (1986) - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Killer Klowns From Outer Space - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Stan Helsing - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
ThanksKilling - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Splice - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Nosferatu (1979) - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Something Wicked This Way Comes -duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Frighteners - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
ThanksKilling 3 - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Little Brother Big Trouble - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
The Forgotten Toys - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Gremlins - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Elf - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Elf That Rescued Christmas - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer (1998) - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Polar Express - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
A Christmas Carol (Mickey, Muppets and Jim Carrey versions) - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Oz The Great and Powerful - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Frozen - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Black Hole - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Brother Bear - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
Oliver and Company - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Atlantis The Lost Empire - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Treasure Planet - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
The Lego Movie - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
My Little Pony: Equestria Girls - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Ruby Gloom Cartoon - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour…
Bio-Dome - duckyworth.deviantart.com/jour… (BAD FILM)
More on the way! :D

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Duckyworth's Thoughts: Bio-Dome (1996)

Journal Entry: Wed Apr 2, 2014, 12:13 PM
  • Mood: Panic
  • Watching: Memento
  • Drinking: Tea


:iconohnoesplz: .............................................

Okay, let’s cut to the chase, no intro or delaying the inevitable this time, so I can get it over with quicker. Ever since I started reviewing films, I have been accepting requests from my friends for films to check out, and if I get enough requests, I decide to check them out. Bio-Dome is one of the films that I have got quite a few requests for but have neglected reviewing... until now. I probably passed it off for quite a while because I had HORRIBLE memories of hearing Pauly Shore’s ear-raping voice when I saw the Nostalgia Critic’s review of it. Well, after seeing Stan Helsing, a few of my friends said that this film was WORSE than Stan Helsing.... :fear: Worse than a film which insulted the autistic, Michael Jackson and horror films in general.....

Out of some naive, morbid curiosity, I watched it, and................ :icondoublefacepalmplz: Dear God... I think that a good chunk of my brain just died.... Yep, I watched the Nostalgia Critic review of this film, and trust me when I say it’s JUST as bad as he made it seem..... Imagine Dude Where’s My Car, after it’s been raped by Stan Helsing, and was threw up by Shaymin from Giratina and the Sky Warrior.... THAT’S what this film is like... And on that pleasant start, let’s take a look.... Emphasis on the word ‘try’.

 

To start off, even the OPENING CREDITS are a pain to sit through – all those flashing credits, pointless things being thrown at me and that obnoxious music that is actually rather hard to hear over the pointless sound effects thrown over it, doesn’t put me in a very good mood.... And - *sees a creepy satanic lovechild of Gizmo and Jar Jar Binks be thrown at me when ‘Joey Adams’ comes up in the opening credits* GAARGH! :ohnoes: That’s actually SCARY! Is this film TRYING to make me turn it off? :cries:

Come on, I know that Dude Where’s My Car had some rather odd stuff in the opening credits, but those odd visuals were nowhere NEAR as badly edited together, and actually TIE into the story... Here, the visuals just make no sense and look like they were put together by someone on a bad acid trip... Oh wait, the director probably smoked something pretty strong to come up with this stuff... As well as the THREE writers who worked on it.... GOD! Come on, START ALREADY! Stop showing me pointless pictures of rubbish being thrown about! Finally, two minutes later, it ends... :phew: That was..... painful...

 

The next scene suddenly goes into a talk about environmental disasters, environmentalists and a scientist named Noah Faulkner announcing (without moving his lips :hmm: ) that he and a team of scientists and investors (by the way, grammatical error here – a team of scientists and investors HAS come together.... Shouldn’t it be HAVE come together? :confused: ) to create the world’s first space station on Earth...... Er, how can be a space station if it’s not, you know, IN SPACE? :hmm: Anyway, this is the titular Bio-Dome, and this film takes place on Earth Day? Oh, so is this going to be a Fern Gully-esque environmental film?

 NOOOOOOOOO – that would take some TALENT. Instead, we cut to our main characters..... The plot gets off the ground really quickly with the two waking up and discovering a large mass of pudding in their cupboard, a random man in their house, and their car being missing – no, sorry, sorry – wrong film. THAT would be the RIGHT thing to do – from Dude Where’s My Car, the much BETTER stoner film.... Instead, here, the plot doesn’t want to get started and we’re treated to –

Pauly Shore – ‘Paper covers rock! Chanoo, rock queen... Roww, rowwww..’

:nuu: GAAAGH. Please don’t tell me these are the characters we’re following in this film... *sees the one run towards the other and bash him with a book, the one horribly flying backwards and hitting a bookcase with obnoxious bird sound effects playing* Yep... sadly, they are.... :faint: Yeah, the plot doesn’t to get started and we get two minutes of extremely boring, unfunny and annoying filler..... That is one of the main problems with this film. For most of these 91 minutes... literally NOTHING happens... :x

Oh wait, the Pauly Shore one – named Squirrel - gets kissed by his.... THIS guy has a girlfriend? How can HE get a girlfriend sounding like THAT? Anyway, he says Doyle, the one played by Stephen Baldwin, had an accident... Er, you clobbered him with a book, you douchebag! :x ...........Oh lord, do I have to put with your screeching for the whole thing, Pauly Shore? And do I have to get concerning close-ups of Doyle’s face.... The two girlfriends are environmentalists who are wanting to clean up the park for Earth Day, and their boyfriends are douchebags who try to weasel their way out of helping by... clobbering each other with books and.... Okay, why is the blond haired girl sounding like the lost Chipette? I already have Pauly Shore and Stephen Baldwin to put up with, I don’t need you too.... :x At least she says one of the only smart lines in the film – ‘You guys are pathetic.’ Truer words were never spoken.... The two girlfriends ditch the two schmucks, and we get an... interesting conversation.....

‘They’re taking yoga, and you’re the one who keeps saying how flexible Butt is getting...’

‘There is something about a man who can lick his own back...’

:icondoublefacepalmplz: HOW. THE HELL. IS THAT. POSSIBLE.

But it turns out that Butt (that’s one of Squirrel’s nicknames, by the way :facepalm: ) IS pretty flexible, as we see him......... biting his own toenails... :puke: Er... EW?! And then Doyle starts..... biting Squirrel’s toenails – Squirrel says ‘the one with the corn’... IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY?! :x And judging by the grotesque sound effects.... that sounds like it HURTS... OW. This scene actually brings back really painful memories of when I was a child – my dad hurt his big toe really badly, and the nail actually broke, and I had a nightmare that his toenail would come off completely... Okay, sorry if I’m filling your heads with horrible thoughts there, but that’s honestly what came to mind when I saw this scene... It made me sick, repulsed, and because of those childhood memories, pretty scared... :cries: And we’re only 8 minutes in.....

Anyway, after that completely pointless scene, we get another one. The two girlfriends call the two douchebags, and say they’re going to a party with some swimmers... GOOD, even those two deserve better boyfriends than those schmucks... And Butt (okay, I think this name is MUCH more fitting, this guy is quite a literal ASS :x ) says to Doyle ‘Our girls have been seduced by breast strokers.’

:iconangryplz: HA.

And the two leave to find them... in a really gross car. And... when they drive past a tumbleweed, for some reason it.. explodes, and the tumbleweed makes a squealing sound... :confused: What’s the joke? Anyway, guess what they drive past – a huge pile of.... beer barrels, and it’s the Bio-Dome... :iconofcourseplz: And the next line is both confusing and PAINFUL....

Doyle – ‘Bio-Dome. Do you think that means it goes both ways?’

Butt – ‘I don’t know, but we do.’

Both - *go up to each other and make... really obnoxious tongue wagging noises*

UGH... Dear lord, I think we need to check the ‘annoyance meter’... :nuu: *checks it* Hmm... wow, they’ve passed Baron Alberto from Rise of Darkrai! I have to admit, guys, that’s quite impressive.................... :sarcasticclap: They come across an old.... dried up lake, where I think their girlfriends were – establishing shot, WHAT’S THAT? – and we get a... rather concerning flashback. Of Butt’s mom trying to..... drown him... :ohnoes: Okay, as much as I hate Butt, I think that this is one possible reason why Butt turned out so messed up in the head! She’s not even on screen for a minute, and ALREADY this mom is quite high on my ‘worst parents ever’ list... :x That.. was NOT funny.. that was HORRIFYING..... Child abuse is NOT funny, as back then, he didn’t do anything to deserve that... And strangely enough, even after seeing THAT, they still make Butt too unlikeable to sympathise with... I have to admit, writers, that takes some TALENT! :x

*sees Doyle throw a cup on the ground, and when Butt seems to be being a good person and prevent littering, he just takes out the free coupon from it, and throws it back on the ground, and then they do a...... really annoying dance. This lasts for, I’m serious here, 30 seconds – 30 seconds of pointlessness*

:iconevilwutplz: TELL. A STORY. Failing that, at least do something that’s REMOTELY entertaining. They drive past the Bio-Dome – wait a minute, didn’t we just go through this scene? – and FINALLY go to it.... So, yeah, that last seven minutes was completely pointless.... :no:

 

The plot FINALLY gets rolling when we see the scientists about to begin their big project – lock themselves in the Bio-Dome for a year and try to sustain life inside. Unfortunately, Satan’s stooges come along to, get this, USE THE TOILETS. Er... you’d think there’d be better security for this IMPORTANT SCIENTIFIC ESTABLISHMENT... Who organised the security for this place? The idiots who only let a handful of guards patrol the Crystal Palace in Equestria Girls?! :x Oh wait, they do have one guard who at least tries to stop them going in – and I feel sorry for that poor guy – putting up with Doyle’s.... er, martial arts.... Jackie Chan, he isn’t. At least after a.... concerning bit of Butt... stroking the guard’s cheek :ohnoes:, the two bumholes leave....

By the way, Noah Faulkner is played by William Atherton, who also played Walter Peck in Ghostbusters – you know, that guy who said the Ghostbusters’ facility wasn’t environmentally friendly? By the way, what’s with the way he’s moving his hands? He introduces us to the scientists – Ms Olivia Biggs, Mr T.C. Romulus, Ms Petra Von.... did he really say Petra Von KUNT?! :ohnoes:, and Ms Mimi Simpkins.... Er, I’m sorry, no offence against scientists who try to pamper themselves and keep themselves looking nice, but I agree with the Nostalgia Critic when he said that only Olivia and T.C. look like real scientists.... :shrug: Cut to the two idiots who – get this – USE AN EXPLODING BAG TO TRICK PEOPLE INTO THINKING THEY’RE BEING GUNNED DOWN, and they use this as an opportunity to sneak in past the guard and let Doyle pee.... :ohnoes: Wow, they ARE douchebags! And how does the one guard they sneak by not notice them?! The two idiots sneak into the rainforest area to relieve themselves, and wouldn’t you know it, this is bad news for the health of the water.... And the two idiots walk up and wave to the people outside like the douchebags they are... :x They kill one of the bugs the scientists are studying, and.... they act like they did nothing wrong.... And the one guy in charge of the system says they’re two ‘special scientists’ and uses them to introduce ‘chaos theory’ into the system..... Wow. Someone’s trying to disguise his guilt... While acting like an ass himself...  But at least it seems like he’s as annoyed as the audience is, as he tries to tell Noah to get the idiots out – and Noah says that if they’re let out, the whole experiment is compromised –

Okay, okay. STOP. :police: You’re a scientist. Start acting like one. Open the door and let them out – all that will happen is that the counter will be restarted. You’ll have lost, what, FIFTEEN minutes? Thirty at most. Use that PEA you call a BRAIN! What, underneath that mullet, is your head completely composed of hot air?! :x The other scientists keep TELLING you that it’s such a terrible idea, and yet you go along with it, saying the system will adapt? Those two are NOT adaptable. If you let them stay, you’re probably going to end up with five dead scientists, millions of pounds of investments gone to waste, a news scandal that will cover the world, and hundreds, maybe thousands of square metres of dead plantlife.... YOU. IDIOT. :x

 

The two schmucks start.... er... hitting on the female scientists.... In the most annoying way possible... Using some REALLY tired chat-up lines... And she begins SMILING. Looks like Noah and the two idiots aren’t the only SCHMUCKS here. One..... really horrible ear-raping ‘song’ later, Noah shows the boys the broom cupboard, where they’ll be sleeping... GOD. SOMEONE RIP OUT THEIR VOCAL CORDS. Don’t believe me when I say they should have their vocal cords ripped out? One scene is where they play rock paper scissors for the pillow, blanket, and for fun – Butt wins all three times, and after he wins, he says he wins in really annoying ways, and when he wins for fun....

*hears Pauly Shore’s satanic screeching laughter, and crawls into a fetal position and whimpers* :fear: Mommy... tell the horrible man to stop screeching... I’m going to have nightmares.... *gets up* Where are they on the ‘annoyance meter’? *checks the meter* Now they’ve passed Myrtle Edmunds from Lilo and Stitch.... Dearie me... Only twenty-one minutes in, and I feel like I’m going to have an aneurysm...

Speaking of nightmares, the female scientists are probably going to have nightmares, as the two idiots sneak up to them in their sleep, and.... I.... er.... :jawdrop: *watches them practically RAPING them :fear: * Er... RAPE and ADULTERY! Because THAT’S funny.... No! That’s NOT funny! That’s absolutely HORRIFYING! :cries: Those poor two scientists are probably going to be MENTALLY scarred after this. If the woman from The Howling got mentally scarred after being raped by that werewolf.... These two are probably going to go through the rest of their life never being able to sleep without horrible memories again.... I hope you’re happy, guys... :iconseethingplz: (By the way, in case you can’t tell which way this review is going, Destiny Deoxys and Rise of Darkrai are no longer in ‘The 13 Worst Films I’ve Ever Reviewed’ list...)

 

Anyway, this is where things get..... really tedious. After 30 seconds of random shots of animals, the scientists (by the way, the two who got raped the previous night look surprisingly chipper) give the two idiots a tour of the ripoff of The Eden Project, and the two guys START SMOKING INSIDE THE BIODOME... WOW, aren’t these guys douchebags?! :x Then we get a.... *sees a cutaway joke of them SHAVING THEIR OWN DOG at home* What’s the joke?! Wow, most pointless cutaway since The Cat in the Hat’s ‘Easy Like Sunday Morning’ scene....  After Doyle.... scratches his privates (flattering), the idiots leave, NOT FOLLLOWING Noah’s instructions, and............ the film pretty much STOPS after this point... :x

 

I’m serious – the next scene is the idiots annoyingly trying to get and torturing Olivia asking how long they’re trapped in there for. This is a long and tedious segment... Nothing of substance happens... :yawn: Except that I get my eardrums killed again (I feel sorry for Olivia, as she leaves, doubtless annoyed by these schmucks) by the douches doing that obnoxious ‘mini tribal’ rubbish, and Doyle running into the glass door... :evillaugh: Sadly, it does not kill him. :no: The next group of scenes compose of nothing but these drunkards prancing about like idiots, the one scientist acting like a.... bit of a whore and is suggestive with a carrot (maybe that explains why she isn’t so bothered about the raping incident), Butt doing more annoying yoga, and the slut scientist actually... LAUGHING. Okay, calm down bitch... Pauly Shore is NOT funny. You must be pretty drunk to find this kind of thing funny.... :no: And – *hears crunching sounds of Pauly Shore’s bones* OWWW! :nuu: God, this sounds painful.... Almost as painful as... the idiots randomly slipping on each other...

 

Anyway, we now cut back to those two environmental bimbos from earlier, and they see Butt and Doyle trapped in the Bio-Dome, and they then rush to talk to them... Butt and Doyle act like schmucks again – I want to strangle them so hard – and for some reason, these two girlfriends act like that bitch from Stan Helsing and find them attractive.... IDIOTS. The kissing the glass scene goes on for... way too long, and they then leave.... And they cut to dinner, and... *sees Doyle spit food* Yuk. And then Butt – er...

Butt: ‘I am so fat..... Nobody likes me. People didn’t like me in high school..’ *then the scene just... ends*

DO SOMETHING IMPORTANT. :iconladyeverglotofaceplz: FURTHER THE STORY. DEVELOP THE CHARACTERS. DO SOMETHING OF SUBSTANCE!! I BEG OF YOU! PLEASE!

 

*gets a pointless flashback scene with constant fart jokes* Why thank you, that is the complete OPPOSITE of what I wanted. Hell, STAN HELSING had more of a plot than this stupid film! And then we get some more horrible people, in the form of the one girlfriends’ brother (do the girlfriends even have names?) And Butt and Doyle see T-shirts printed of them and - *hears Pauly Shore laugh* :nuu: URRRRGGGGGGGGHHH... :iconfrozenyoghngoverplz: Okay, now you’re making GEORGIA from Oliver and Company seem tolerable in comparison.... And why can’t that idiot talking to them understand how HORRIBLE these two dumbasses are.... Who would want ACTION figures of these schmucks?!

 

*sees new scene, a flashback of Butt pushing Doyle off a roof* FOR GOD’S SAKE – this film has more pointless scenes than The Room.... GNNGH.... Once again, we get some really long boring segments of nothing happening.... :yawn: And I’m just.... losing interest now, but instead of forcing you to look away, like Cool World did, this forces your endurance... You barely manage to make it through with your brain intact.... The pointlessness pretty much goes on for the next ten minutes... Oh wait, the two girlfriends hear about a Rainforest Event, and.... say they need to start thinking about themselves, and then we cut to – Gnnngh... Every sound these two make sounds like Satan throwing up.... :x

You want to know what GREAT likeable thing they did now? Okay – after they TRAMPLE ON THE CROPS, they show that they used the ENTIRE FRUIT HARVEST to make some stupid kind of fruit smoothie... At LAST, the two slut scientists start to wake up to how stupid they are, and they do the... GOD, enough with this MINI-TRIBAL bullsh**! This dance is not endearing in the slightest... and you’re ruining their hard-earned crops! *checks annoyance meter* They’ve passed Iris and Kidd Summers from Pokemon - *hears horrible yelling in pointless scene when they’re in an artificial ain generator, and they knowingly FART in it* GNNGH! Make that inbetween Vanellope Von Schweetz from Wreck It Ralph and Shaymin from Giratina and the Sky Warrior... YES, they’re higher than VANELLOPE VON SCHWEETZ now... I AM SERIOUS. I hate them THAT much. And.... I think my brain is starting to seep out of my ears... This film doesn’t treat its audience like idiots, it treats its audience like SH**. :iconseethingplz: And now they food at the windows, and Noah STILL accepts them, and everyone starts kissing up to them....

 

You know – there’s so many pointless scenes in this film that I’m wondering whether this really IS a film! This seems like a pointless collection of deleted SCENES compiled together. Now... I know that I shouldn’t say this, but I legitimately CANNOT see how this could get any worse –

*in the next scene, Butt and Doyle are playing hide-and-seek, and Doyle hides in T.C’s lab, where’s he studying insects, and has obviously worked painstakingly to get his insect models done. Doyle and T.C start talking about the butterflies* Oh great. Now the film’s taunting me. :fear: *the conversation continues, and then Butt stumbles in. He starts YELLING, and the two of them start running about* Are – are you SERIOUS? The only bit of intelligence the film had, and it ruins it... :iconshockedfaceplz: *Butt and Doyle start OPENING THE POTS of insects, and T.C stares in horror as he’s thrown about and all his hard work is laid to ruin, and the two schmucks start making annoying buzzing sounds* JESUS CHRIST!! :iconbrainfreeze3plz: Is... is this supposed to be funny?! No – the only way that this scene could have ANY point is to show us how dangerous these two SADISTS are – which they already did on numerous occasions! This is not charming at all! This goes BEYOND stupidity. You have to make a GENUINE EFFORT to cause this much pain and suffering! As if I needed any more proof, this scene made it all so clear – these two are MONSTERS. Literal MONSTERS! Locking them up? NO – these two need to be KILLED before they can cause anymore harm! :cries: All throughout this, their stupidity has morphed into some of the most HATED characters in media for me – more than Kidd Summers, more than Shaymin, even more than VANELLOPE VON SCHWEETZ! Hell, they’re on par with NEW PATRICK now. The only way it could get any worse is for them to KILL one of the scientists! And if you don’t think they’re stupid enough to do so, you haven’t been paying attention.... And worst of all... we’re only forty minutes in.... :cries:

 

Sigh..... sorry... :cries: Now, after one random scene with a guy who I swear was played by Brad Pitt, the two girlfriends (who STILL don’t have names) meet up with two guys who are environmentalists too, and then... back to the scientists, who are FINALLY coming to their senses and deciding to do something about those two MONSTERS from destroying any more of their hard work - *sees a window smash* :ohnoes: DAMNIT! They could have KILLED someone with that golf ball! See what I mean?! They couldn’t have got that window by accident – they had to make a GENUINE EFFORT to do that! :cries: And yet, that idiotic guy from earlier keeps on making ACTION FIGURES for them – STOP. FEEDING. INTO. THEIR EGOS. :x And then they start.... hitting each other randomly.... TELL A STORY!! Once again, pointless scene, and in the desert, they..... oh good, Doyle starts strangling Butt! :evillaugh: Oh damnit, they just go on to take T.C to.... I don’t like where this is going... I really don’t like where this is going.... You would wonder why T.C would go along with it after their last scene..... They catch the bugs by.... using giant bug paper.... :ohnoes: Yep, they’re monsters. That KILLS bugs, you idiots. How could you NOT know that?! I GET that this is the joke. But it’s not even REMOTELY funny. Ruining a scientist’s hard work that they’ve worked on for quite a while and have no doubt spent TONS of money on IS NOT FUNNY! :rage:

And I actually DO feel sorry for T.C when he cries out. Again, that is not comedy. That is TRAGEDY. :x And then, in another pointless filler scene that only serves to convince me even MORE that these two are the banes of my existence, the two of them partake in a clichéd ‘crawling through the vents’ scene, and break into the food storage, and after screeching in INCREDIBLY ANNOYING voices, they break into the food storage and start eating all of their food, and then... they start sucking up LAUGHING GAS..... Oh no... :fear: *covers ears in preparation* GOD. *feels eardrums explode* MAKE IT STOP! Damn, are these two even NORMAL FUNCTIONING HUMAN BEINGS?! They’re stabbing each other with needles, for damn sake! They must have some kind of SEVERE mental problem! And I know mental conditions! I have autism! And not even the most SEVERELY AFFECTED of autistic people would act like this!

:iconnostalgiacriticplz::iconsaysplz:OKAY – these two were DROPPED! Either that, or they were some kind of special needs kids! There is no way that these two are normal functioning human beings – especially if they think that THIS SH** IS FUNNY!

 

So the scientists, after TWENTY FIVE-ish days of hell, and after thirty-five-ish minutes of screentime, FINALLY do something about these douchebags – kick them out into the desert of the Biodome, leaving them to starve to death... And the film tries to make me feel sympathy for them.... Something which is NOT going to happen... This film has me officially siding with the ‘villain’.... :x An entire THREE MINUTES of extremely filler passes, trying to make me sympathise with these schmucks... GOD, GET ON WITH IT!

:iconmontypythongodplz::iconsaysplz:GET ON WITH IT!

Those two slut scientists try to convince Noah to stop what he’s doing, but I still don’t care for them. I know that a scientist wouldn’t actually commit murder in real life, but those two douchebags SHOULD die, in my opinion. :x

When Butt is about to EAT A LIZARD :o, Doyle - *sees Doyle find a KEY, and opens the window, RELEASING them from the Bio-Dome*WHAT THE HELL!? :ohnoes: They could have been let out the back door this whole time, but the stupid scientists ALLOWED them to stay in for TWENTY-FIVE days?! THE HELL?! :ohnoes: Plot-holes that could rival those in The Elf That Rescued Christmas! :x

 

Luckily, they got their car clamped – because they deserve it – but sadly, they call a taxi. Oh, it’s the one girlfriends’ brother, and he tells them that there’s a party the girlfriends are at, so.... They start fighting over their ‘chicks’... And throw their own party. Guess where it will be. No, seriously. Guess where it will be. YEP. Right first time. AT THE BIODOME. :rage: Yep, they’re as bad as New Patrick... And they talk on the phone to someone while eating.... Okay, Beavis and Butthead were more intelligent than these guys....

:iconbeavis-plz::iconsaysplz:Surrender your peepee to my bunghole!

 

Okay, now back to the girlfriends from earlier, who are at an environmental rally, listening to.... Tenacious D?! :iconyeahplz:  Finally! Talent! :w00t: Please, Jack Black, bring some humour into my life again - *sees everyone leave to go to the Bio-Dome part* No... PLEASE! :ohnoes: Keep with the TALENTED guys here... Dagh.... no, sorry Tenacious D... You got denied your chance... A mere TWENTY SECOND cameo from Tenacious D is the ONLY redeeming factor this film has so far... If you don’t want to count the set designs and some of the acting from the minor characters....

Now, okay... to this film’s credit, the next joke actually DID get a laugh out of me. The monitor in the Bio-Dome reads ‘All hell is breaking loose.’ :giggle: *sniggers* Okay, that’s ONE good joke, looks like the writers grew a brain cell for that ONE joke. :phew: Sadly, that’s the highlight of the film – now it goes back to those douchebags from earlier.... :x

*sees the party, as the scientists watch in horror at everything being wrecked, their animals being ROASTED ON A BARBECUE :ohnoes: and everyone causing a ruckus*

:iconsandycheeksplz::iconsaysplz:Stupidity isn’t a virus... but it sure is SPREADING like one!

Well said, Sandy... well said... :no: Oh, and we get a drunk guy throwing up into the lake.... That’s nice. :x Noah, UNDERSTANDABLY, lashes out at one of the drunken partygoers, and then all the other drunken idiots form a mosh-pit... Looking on the outside... is it just me, or does this seem like a LAMER version of that party from Ginger Snaps – you know, the one which took place inside that greenhouse? :confused: My only hope for this film becoming better is that the blond girlfriend turns into a werewolf and starts EATING Pauly Shore and Stephen Baldwin... But I don’t hold out much hope... :facepalm: And by the way, this bit is more BORING than annoying.... It’s another long portion of NOTHING happening... Apart from two idiots saying they want to get laid rather than save the environment... Oh, and... oh no. Speak of the devil, here come Satan’s hellspawn themselves... Trying PAINFULLY to be funny, and... okay. Those Hawaiian guys (I think they’re Hawaiian, judging by what they’re wearing) deserve much better than this... I’d much rather get them performing some kind of Hawaiian culture dance than listen to Butt and Doyle continue their bloated ego trips...

The blond one says ‘YOU A**HOLES!’ That is EXTREMELY generous... Satan asks THEM for advice, and.... for some reason, the camera zooms in on Noah.... You know what, throughout this sequence, I feel pretty sorry for him... All this hard work, and I can just IMAGINE what he’s going through... Cut to the next morning, where the Biodome is absolutely destroyed, and Butt and Doyle try (to no avail) to redeem themselves, by just....... picking up things. Okay, cleaning up litter is good and all, but... you singlehandedly DESTROYED millions of pounds worth of scientific research –PICKING RUBBISH UP is NOT going to help at all. :x I doubt that even the fairies from FERNGULLY or the Great Forest Spirit from Princess Mononoke could fix what you’ve caused... In fact, I just keep wishing that either Moro would come out and rip their heads off, that black sludge from the Nightwalker would engulf them, or Krista would use her bean to turn them into trees so they know how it feels what they’ve done.... :rage: The girlfriends (again, do they EVER get names given to them?!) finally leave the idiots – saying they want to never seem them again (I think that’s a quote on the DVD box :lol: ), and the camera pans on the douches... looking sad and forlorn, trying to get some SYMPATHY from them.... Once again, saying sorry cannot solve everything, guys...

And now the guy who had been making action figures for those d***s comes in and.... starts blaming the scientists for the damage and the toxin levels..... Introducing the THIRD stupidest character in the film... Wannabe Leslie Nielsen over here.... :rage: And next, we see the scientists try to leave, but Doyle literally LOCKS THEM IN :ohnoes:, and says they’re taking over the dome.... Er, didn’t you ALREADY take over the dome? Hello? Doyle gives... what I think is supposed to be a motivation speech (to be honest, I started falling asleep here... :yawn: ) and then he says that if the scientists don’t help them, he’ll.... swallow the key.... And he does too, so they’re literally HOLDING THE SCIENTISTS HOSTAGE, FORCING THEM to help clean up their mess.... :fear: Wow, even when they try to redeem themselves, they’re being jerks... When T.C says ‘We’re all gonna die!’ I end up agreeing with him... Those two guys probably have the minds of SERIAL KILLERS inside them.... :o

 

Speaking of SERIAL KILLERS, the next scene involves an unnecessarily CRUEL scene of a clown getting shot................. :iconmrkrabsscreamplz: I.... I have nothing.... I have absolutely NOTHING to say to that.... What CAN be said?

Almost as much as can be said for the NEXT scene, where the idiots and the scientists, who are going along with their plan to improve homeostasis to revive the plantlife, just.... pick up rubbish... Yeah, that will help.... Almost as much as the guy saying ‘Do you realise how many laws you’ve broken?!’ Guy – you’re as much to blame as they are – stop trying to pass the baton of guilt. He asks Doyle for the key, and.... *Doyle turns around, and drops his trousers, showing his butt* :jawdrop:

:puke: DAAAAAAARGH!!! Damnit it movie!! I... I’ve had a hard enough time listening to their COMEDY, now you have to show me that guy’s BUTT?! The hell’s wrong with you?! :shakefist: And it just.... holds on his butt pressed against the screen for.... WAY too long!

For some reason – actually, for no reason at all, the girlfriends give those schmucks another chance.... I don’t know why... in the slightest. The film forgot to give me a reason why. Like in Destiny Deoxys with the cubes somehow turning evil, this happens because the writers WANT it to happen – throwing all logic to the wind, no rhyme or reason. I’m sorry – but you have not warranted a touching moment, film... :x For example, seeing the characters and how they acted earlier, NOTHING, in my opinion, would convince them to help these two... Once again, it feels like the writers are taking the route that bad MLP:FiM episode Rainbow Falls took – ‘I’m making this thing happen, because I want this thing to happen.’ Sorry folks, but that episode is pretty bad, in my opinion... :x

 

To inspire them all to work better, the security guards play - *hears Safety Dance playing* Oh.... OH! Music that I can enjoy! Sweet music! :headbang: Thanks film, I needed something easy on the ears.... A shame we’re 70 minutes in, with only ten or so minutes to go.... And for some reason, this inspires the scientists to get along with the douchebags.... Again, no rhyme or reason. Anyway, it turns out that with NO logic, the homeostasis is FINALLY going up, and.... *hears them yell ‘Trick or treat’* UGH... Ear-rape... Sorry, but this is STILL not charming.... Neither is the helium breathing or ‘mini tribal’ bit.... Or the fart joke bit... GOD, STOP IT! :rage:

Now, for the climax... Walter, it turns out, has gone mad – his hair has grown long and he breaks into the lab... And it turns out that he’s creating explosives to try and blow up the Bio-Dome.... :wow: Okay, I still find myself siding with this guy.... *sees him eat his parrot* And.... NOW I DON’T KNOW WHO TO SIDE WITH. :cries: Who should I go for?! Well, at least I can count how much these two have killed – the two ‘heroes’ have killed hundreds of trees, animals and cost the government millions of pounds, while all the scientist has done is eat ONE parrot. So, I’d take the crazy scientist in a heartbeat. He takes a bunch of coconuts (:iconzazuplz::iconsaysplz:’I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts...’), and we then see the two bimbo scientists saying.... ‘Thank you’. What, for nearly killing them, holding them hostage and downright destroying stuff?! I’m sorry, but I still can’t feel sympathy for them.... Not only do we have HEINOUS comedy and ear-rape, now we have lacklustre writing in the mix... Oh, and they go to..... rape them themselves.... No, gender does NOT make a difference... Both are wrong and both disgust me.... And when they leave when the guys reject them, it looks as though we’re supposed to feel sorry for them? What, because those two rejected your unwanted advances? :x Okay, let me explain why this scene angers me more than say... the three brides scene in Bram Stoker's Dracula, and similar scenes in The Howling - there, the concept of predatory women (this can also be used for any horror film with rape scenes in) was used for HORROR - it was MEANT to shock you there, as it was horror. Those scenes were TRYING to make you feel uneasy, they were TRYING to shock you.... In Bio-Dome - the rape scenes are played for.... comedy... :ohnoes: Pauly Shore, that's not the way to do it..... RAPE IS NOT FUNNY. And plus, on a side note here, the three brides in Bram Stoker's Dracula and the woman in the Howling were MUCH more attractive than you...
And then when the bimbos leave, the two start... clutching their balls...

MY GOD! How did they ADVERTISE this film?! I mean, what did the trailers look like?! :o

:iconbillymaysplz::iconsaysplz:’Hi, Billy Mays here! Earthworm Jim making too much sense for you? Well, treat yourselves to the Paul Shore ‘comedy’ Bio-Dome! You’ll love this undiluted raping of your senses – it’s like watching an English film in Japanese, except that you still have no idea what’s going on! Must be as high as New SpongeBob to watch!’

Thanks, Billy... now back to the snoozefest.... Thank GOD, the film is almost over, okay... :phew:

 

Crawling down a tube, they come across Noah’s ‘lair’.... He’s mixed together nitro-glycerine and coconuts to make explosives..... This film is not even worth questioning anymore... :iconfacepalmplz: Anyway, Noah gives the two idiots some of the.... ugh, explosive coconuts.... And they, like idiots, can’t understand what the HELL the coconuts are for... Even though he was clearly telling them not to drop them earlier... :hmm: The idiots try playing... catch with the coconuts... Please kill them. KILL THEM. KILL THEM! :evillaugh: One of the coconuts lands over Doyle’s head and, the explosion occurs.... Note how that the explosion effect occurs in the bush, but the coconut actually landed a noticeable distance IN FRONT of the bush.... I’m not questioning it, it’s not worth it anymore... If this film wants to have coconuts with the ability to project explosions, I’m just going to roll with it... My brain is already a puddle of mush as it is.... :crazy:

Butt: ‘That was no ordinary coconut...’

DURR! :XD: Anyway, the guards try using a battering ram to open the door, but the glass is too strong.... And now, Noah uses a detonator to try to set off all of the coconut explosives... Er, how would a detonator activate explosive coconuts – did he ever say there was a sensor in each of the coconuts? :confused: Anyway, after an annoying (and BORING :yawn: ) chase scene, Butt grabs the detonator, and Doyle uses the bug paper to trap Noah and... Butt in place. Okay, is this supposed to be a fight scene? It’s these two idiots strangling each other... But Doyle does knock out Noah by throwing a... rock. Butt makes an annoying squeal (like he’s been doing for the past 80 minutes), and the two guys reunite with the scientists.... ‘Yay! We drove our leader to insanity! We’re the best scientists ever!’ Dggh.... But here comes Noah – with one more coconut, which - *sees huge explosion* WHOOO! :w00t: YAY! Butt and Doyle are dead! Yay! :dummy: Oh wait – THEY’RE STILL ALIVE?! Am I missing something?! How did they survive that?! :confused: And everyone cheers for them in... really annoying voices... Their girlfriends... get back together with them... Just roll with it – and T.C, who SAW THEM kill a lot of his insects earlier, says ‘You guys are my heroes’. :x Okay, this IS the writers saying ‘I’m making this thing happen, because I WANT this thing to happen – with no logic or explanations at all...’ At least in Dude Where’s My Car, the main characters WERE pretty funny – all Butt and Doyle have done have acted like DOUCHEBAGS throughout the whole thing.... The experiment is mistaken for a big success by everyone, and then... they drive towards an Energy Research lab – while yelling that ‘mini tribal’ thing AGAIN... Oh no... :ohnoes: It’s happening AGAIN! :nuu: All throughout the world, there’ll be police reports of screeching stoners running around research facilities and killing innocents and costing governments millions in damages.... Oh, and Noah ends the film by running through the desert, insane.... Just like the poor people who sat through this whole painful excuse for a film... :crazy:

 

:iconsquidwardfan::iconsaysplz: SCREW THIS MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As much as Disaster movie is a bad comedy this movie is even WORSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :rage: I F#####g hate this movie with a fiery passion :iconseethingplz: Just.... GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :rage: This movie is so bad.... I.... Don't have anything to say about this movie just it's F#####g bad that it's SO TERRIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS MOVIE CAN GO SCREW IT SELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :X I Hate this movie just.... WHY DID I SHOW YOU THIS MOVIE IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :X

:iconlolitafreak88::iconsaysplz: Escape before it's too late? XD Watch the Nostalgia Critic tear it to shreds?

:iconthomasgamecomicfan::iconsaysplz: f**king hate bio dome,f**king hate bio dome, I F**KING HATE BIO DOME, I HATE IT, I HATE IT,AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!:chainsaw:

I'm sorry....This....THING... is the scum of comedy, and Pauly Shore can die in a fire, NOT FAKING HIS DEATH IN THAT HORRIBLE MOVIE!!!!:X

:iconmovieman410::iconsaysplz: i am so happy i was a baby in the 90s with no cable tv, because i lived in a wonderful world of not even knowing his name

:iconwaywardplatypus::iconsaysplz: You know a film is bad when it has a place on the TV Tropes 'So Bad It's Horrible/Film' page.

And it's own page on the site makes jabs to it whenever possible.

And it's respective 'Awesome' page has only one entry that basically says 'The bad guy tries to kill the good guys at the end'.

 And I was born in the late 90's, so I had hell of an idea on who Paulie Shore was. But after seeing the NC's review of the film, I was so glad I never got to see it as a kid. Or Shore for that matter.

:iconvindurza::iconsaysplz: so bad weird al mentions it in one of his films

:iconshinywhitewaters::iconsaysplz: Biodome? That sounds like the name of some kind of video game. :XD:

I don't know a thing about Biodome though, but I guess I should consider myself safe... Yeah.. I'm just gonna take squidwardfan's advice and let the Nostalgia Critic watch it for me.. :hmm:

:icondestrox71689::iconsaysplz: Nostalgia Critic did it, he did it well, and left me with nothing else to say about it.

 

Let’s go back to Stan Helsing. In that film, four idiots come across a town held in limbo by a gang of monsters, and although they were idiots, outwitted the monsters and saved the town. HERE, two idiots, seeing an opportunity, break into a scientific facility, WILLINGLY raise hell, drive a well-meaning scientist to insanity, cost the government millions, and manage to walk away without facing any consequences. Okay, they DID fix things at the end, but please answer me this – how is simply PICKING UP RUBBISH going to fix what they did?! Again, it makes no SENSE! :nuu: As much as I hate Sunset Shimmer and Ruber, they at least got suitable comeuppance for their crimes – and were the VILLAINS, so it made sense for them to do what they did. These two are HEROES, and never get any real comeuppance... :x As bad as Stan Helsing was – it TOLD A STORY. Yes, it was one of the most insulting, infuriating stories ever written, but it still told a story.

In THIS film, two douchebags walk into a scientific facility, and walk out sometime later... The end, film over. Oh, sorry, did I miss something? By that I mean, did I glance over ANYTHING of substance? Not really. :facepalm: If you don’t get annoyed by the two idiots and can tolerate it (kudos to you), one more thing can be said... this film is absolutely BORING! :yawn: I mean it, for most of these 91 minutes – literally NOTHING happens... Apart from some absolutely annoying mean-spirited RUBBISH! I mean, sure, they cleaned up after themselves, but they at the very least drove a well-meaning scientist to insanity.... What they did HAS to be some kind of crime, and I highly doubt it would be LOGICALLY possible to fix what they did... This needed SOME realm of reality... :x

I... Is there really anything else for me to say about it? Is there even any WORTH in talking about this film? This doesn’t DESERVE to be talked about. The whole thing is ANNOYANCE. 91 minutes of pure, unadulterated ANNOYANCE. There is VERY little redeeming factors for this film.... Well, that’s not ENTIRELY true – some of the acting from the scientist characters and some of the set designs are decent, and I will admit, I did find myself smiling a bit at Noah’s facial expressions and it did have that one joke that worked.... :shrug: Too bad it was all DESTROYED by every bit of annoying, stupid dialogue from our ‘heroes’... Not that it’s the WORST film I’ve seen – Pippi Longstocking, A Fox’s Tale, The Cat in the Hat, The Reef and The Wild are much, MUCH worse. How, you say? Well, they shove similar things in – but they’re for CHILDREN who are innocent to true quality and would have their young minds RAPED by acts of stupidity in those films.... I’m just saying that although it is NO excuse to say that this film is made for adults, it is at least NOT trying to appeal to children – children who watch those five films I mentioned earlier would probably have their minds EXPLODED by their stupidity.... :fear:

But with that said, Bio-Dome is just that – concentrated STUPIDITY. And if you’re reading this right now, Pauly Shore... You’re NOT a comedian. :x You’re just a childish, brain dead HACK who has no grounding in reality.... This film proves that you, Stephen Baldwin, and whoever wrote and directed this TRITE have NO comprehension of the word ‘comedy’... At least Stan Helsing got a professional comedian, the late Leslie Nielsen, in their cast..... You barely got Kylie Minogue – nothing against her, but it’s clear you just got her to appeal to the adolescent male stoners who probably got stupid from watching it... You’re not a comedian. You don’t make comedy. You thought that being in A Goofy Movie was ‘beneath your popularity?’ PFF. :iconseethingplz: I can just imagine you saying that, thinking you’re some kind of bigshot who is the King of Comedy.... Again, if THIS is truly what you call COMEDY, then you are stupider than I thought...... And this film just deserves to die in a hole, and you and Stephen Baldwin need to grow a brain, grow up and stop thinking you can just appeal to the lowest common denominator and get away with it.... At least Dude Where’s My Car had some good jokes, characters who made BELIEVABLE mistakes (like, I actually can tell they were accidents) and actually HELPED PEOPLE OUT of their own accord.... Just.... leave us all alone, and go entertain YOURSELF, because I can’t think of ANY comedy that would sink LOWER than you have –

*sees the Nostalgia Chick review for FREDDY GOT FINGERED – including jokes with sausages, swinging a baby around by its UMBILICAL CORD and an obsession with animals.... er, privates*

:iconjawdrop:

.............................. :crazy: .................. Tom Green..... :iconpissedoffplz: ................TOM GREEN...... TOM GREEN MUST DIE!! :iconfrageplz:

*clears throat* Ahem... sorry.... :iconpantingplz: If I do review.......... THAT, I can’t review it next.... Not after Bio-Dome... I barely survived reviewing Cat in the Hat and The Reef straight after it.... ^^;

 

*takes a drink of cider* :saddrunk: I.... need a film with.... BRAINS and CLASS and an actual CONCEPT OF LOGIC AND FILMMAKING PROWESS to make up for..... Bio-Dome.... :x So, what’s next?

*looks at DVD boxes and sees.... THE ARTIST*

Yes... :love: YES! Save me The Artist! One of my most favourite films of all time! Teach me to appreciate cinema again! :love:

 

 

UPCOMING REVIEWS

_________________________________________________________________________________

:iconbluebulletplz: The Artist :love:

:iconbluebulletplz: Bolt :shrug:

:iconbluebulletplz: Dragonslayer

:iconbluebulletplz: Freddy Got Fingered :crazy:

:iconbluebulletplz: Earthworm Jim Cartoon

:iconbluebulletplz: The Rescuers

:iconbluebulletplz: Sherlock Holmes

:iconbluebulletplz: Fantasia :headbang:

:iconbluebulletplz: Gremlins 2: The New Batch

:iconbluebulletplz: The Hunger



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Journal History

deviantID

Duckyworth
Callum
Artist | Hobbyist | Digital Art
United Kingdom
:iconreadcplz1::iconreadcplz2::iconreadcplz3: :iconreadplz:
:iconnorequests: :iconcollabsfriendsonly::icongiftsfriendsonly: Friendship stamp by JinZhan I won't whine  . . . by Zyden Wishful Thinking by whispwillAutism... not a dunce cap. by StrawberryR:thumb180723921:Weirdness Stamp by JadeCatKunoichiAutism Stamp by callykarishokka

Current Residence: UK
Favourite genre of music: Metal, In-game music, film soundtracks
Favourite style of art: Traditional Art
Operating System: Windows XP
MP3 player of choice: iPod
Favourite cartoon character: Spongebob, Chowder, Ratigan, Stitch, Rainbow Dash
Personal Quote: 'Oh, please, make it stop! It's the squeaking of the hideous boots!!' - Mr Krabs

"As of May the twenty first, deviantART will be deleting ALL dA accounts. Not the plz accounts though. But just all name-wasted accounts, or accounts that we think are fake, or that are useless. We are doing this to prevent something that could possibly may happen in the future. If we find this message on you're deviantID, journal, etc. We will know that you are not a fake.


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Comments


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:iconsquidwardfan:
squidwardfan 9 hours ago  Student Traditional Artist
Um.......................... I reviewed The Wild
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:iconnuclearzeon2:
I think I may have found a movie WORSE than The Wild.

It's called Foodfight. The Nostalgia Critic just reviewed it.
Reply
:iconsquidwardfan:
squidwardfan 5 days ago  Student Traditional Artist
Hi :wave: How is it going :)
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:iconmarkproductions:
MarkProductions Apr 12, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks a lot for the fave!
You could +watch me if you like my art :)
Have a llama badge!
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:iconduckyworth:
Duckyworth Apr 11, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:D
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:iconslushy-pye:
Slushy-Pye Apr 11, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Tater
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:iconduckyworth:
Duckyworth Apr 11, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:iconpotatoesplz:
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:iconadrianawentz26:
AdrianaWentz26 Apr 10, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you for the fav :icontailsloveplz:!! Stitch clap plz 
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:iconrenee-moonveil:
Renee-Moonveil Apr 10, 2014  Student Digital Artist
thx for the fav~
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:iconduckyworth:
Duckyworth Apr 10, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
You're welcome. :D
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:iconmokka-quill:
Mokka-Quill Apr 8, 2014  New member Student General Artist
Thanks so much for the fave! :icondragonhugplz:
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:iconduckyworth:
Duckyworth Apr 9, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
You're welcome. :D
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:iconduckyworth:
Duckyworth Apr 8, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
The link doesn't work.
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:iconthearist2013:
thearist2013 3 days ago  Student General Artist
new solution:
www.avaaz.org/en/stop_the_corp…
when your done with it pass it on to your family and friends
Reply
:iconyuki-photo:
Thank you so much for the fav :heart:

Feel free to follow me on Facebook: www.facebook.com/PhotographyYu… for more pictures (if you dont do that already :heart:)
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:iconduckyworth:
Duckyworth Apr 7, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
You're welcome. :)
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:iconflamiya:
Thank you for the fav :)
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:iconduckyworth:
Duckyworth Apr 6, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:)
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:iconsquidwardfan:
squidwardfan Apr 6, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks for the fav
Reply
:iconduckyworth:
Duckyworth Apr 6, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
You're welcome.
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:iconsquidwardfan:
squidwardfan Apr 6, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
:aww:
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