Bottom 21 Least Favourite Films So Far

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Hello everybody! :wave:

I'm currently working on my review of Bartok the Magnificent, and I should have it done soon, but I go back to university on Monday, so my updates on this website will most likely be less frequent. So that I can submit something, I just decided to do something different - giving you a list of my Bottom 21 Least Favourite Films I've Reviewed So Far. I've been reviewing films for nearly three years on Deviantart, and even though most of the films I've reviewed are ones I've enjoyed.... there have been a number that have been... less than enjoyable for me. ^^; And so, to put in in perspective, I thought it would be an interesting idea to list the 21 films in particular that have enraged, bored, terrified and confused me to no end, and a small summary as to why I dislike those films. So, here we go. :fear:

21. Alpha and Omega (Terrible character designs and uncanny animation, an absolutely clichéd story, blatant rip-offs of much better films like Balto, Bolt, Brother Bear, The Lion King and many other films mixed in, terrible attempts at jokes which are mostly composed of badly abused toilet and gross out humour... and top of that, it's absolutely boring... And it's pandering to wolfaboos, on top of all that....)

20. Quest For Camelot (Similar story problems to Alpha and Omega, being terribly clichéd and ripping off of other films, but with an incredibly HUMONGOUS amount of plotholes, an absolute helpless joke of a main character, a laughable villain, gratuitous terrible songs... minus the only GOOD song, The Prayer, which is poorly placed in an ACTION SCENE... )

19. Lion King 1 1/2: Hakuna Mattata (Basically, all this film is is shoehorning in Timon and Pumbaa into every scene from the first one and botching them to no end.... Throwing in terrible fart jokes, completely misunderstood conflicts, and.... above all things, mocking the infamous stampede scene... Yeah, there are some lines you CAN'T cross film, and that was one of them... Placing them in THAT scene in particular was completely uncalled for...)

18. Little Brother Big Trouble (Niko and Oona lose all likeability in this film that they had in the previous one, as Niko tells his younger stepbrother he has NO REASON TO LIVE, and Oona jumps her new husband on Niko at the last minute.... The villain is a lazy recoloring of the villain from the first one, and there are annoying eagle henchmen, more bad singing, and a completely obnoxious climax...)

17. The Flight Before Christmas (Absolutely HORRID parenting, uncomforting statements about the main character's father, Prancer, being a womanising drunkard who had a ONE NIGHT STAND with the main characters mother (yeah, it's not just implied, it's downright STATED), and... for some reason, Niko WANTS to seek this horrid deadbeat parent out, and one of the most forgettable villains with one of the STUPIDEST goals I've ever seen..... Oh, and bad singing and a completely pointless poodle character.... And not to mention the moral not being only bad, but actually DANGEROUS - it's the kind of moral that could actually get someone KILLED if they followed it with enough fervour...)

16. Cool World (Horrible acting, no logic to the story whatsoever, disgusting imagery, a completely DETESTABLE female lead - yeah, Holli Would is STILL in my Top 20 Least Favourite Female Characters - and of course, a blatant ripoff of Roger Rabbit.... But I feel bad, because I do like the characters of Nails the Spider and Dr Whiskers, and Ralph Bakshi's original concept for the film sounds awesome, but corporate executives destroyed his dream... He flat out ADMITTED in an interview that he didn't give the animators and storywriters ANY direction... which explains a lot...)

15. Legend of the Guardians: Owls of Ga'Hoole (... Probably my Number 1 film I hate but everyone else seems to like.... While the animation and music is cool, it FAILS horribly in how it completely FAILS to follow the source material properly... I'm a fan of the Guardians of Ga'Hoole series, and let me tell you.... they're MUCH better than the film. The transitions are non-existent, the characters that were memorable and very likeable from the books have been turned into obnoxiously forgettable ghosts of their former selves - and Digger, Twilight, Jatt and Jutt have been butchered HORRIBLY - the villains are some of the most boring and forgettable I've ever seen, the slow-mo is thrown into every other scene to the point of which it becomes annoying, either no exposition or too MUCH exposition instead of building up emotions for the characters, pretentious writing that feels more like the plot is in BULLET POINTS rather than an actual flowing story, and a main character that is a non-entity.... It may share the title with The Last Airbender as the worst adaptation of all time...)

14. The Little Mermaid 2: Return to the Sea (While not the WORST of the films I've seen, this is probably the LAZIEST one I've seen... It's the exact SAME film as the first film - except with terrible re-hashes of Ariel and Ursula, some rather uncanny moments of animation which are either carbon copies of scenes from the first film or retraced Glen Keane artwork from the first film, and character's personalities being changed just to suit the plot... The penguin and walrus are ripoffs of the already annoying Timon and Pumbaa - and worst of all, they find a way to make a TARA STRONG character unbearable... yeah, Melody is probably Tara Strong at her very WORST...)

13. Atlantis 2: Milo's Return (Three incredibly boring stories that don't link into each other at all, paper-thin versions of the main characters from the first film, a horribly POINTLESS lava dog character that does almost NOTHING of use, and some of the lowest quality 'film' animation Disney has produced.... It's actually a shame, because I feel some of the stories COULD have worked if they were fully realised...)

12. Hunchback of Notre Dame 2 (Quasimodo did NOT need a love interest.... especially not one as bland and annoying as Madeline... Oh, and Zephyr is Haley Joel Osment at his very worst.... The songs are painful, the villain is a joke, the animation is terrible, continuity is thrown to the wind, and plot points are beaten into the heads of the audience so much it's practically insulting their intelligence...)

11. The Elf That Rescued Christmas (The worst from Anima Vitae, in my opinion... It doesn't have life threatening morals like Flight Before Christmas, but... this film is insulting on another level. It's a film which is constant noise from beginning to end, the animation is ugly, the side characters are pointless, the villain is a joke - if not more morally sound than the film puts him out to be (he plans to teach discipline to children - which, according to this film, is one of the most heinous crimes imaginable), the voice acting is grating, the dubbing almost NEVER matches the lip movements, there are plot holes everywhere, and... it's got insulting geographical inaccuracies as well - as far as I can tell, there are NO active VOLCANOES in Lapland... But seriously, folks.. let's get into the REAL bad stuff.. the BIG ONES...)

10. Stan Helsing (The only true way to sum up this film is to call it the perfect analogy as how far parody films have fallen in recent years. It seems like a live action version of Ren and Stimpy's Adult Party Cartoon in places, with a horde of disgusting gross out and sex jokes, incredibly annoying main characters, nearly all of the female characters being depicted as brain dead sex objects, and the so called 'parodies' of the famous movie monsters having almost NOTHING in common with what they're supposed to parody... Also, the late Leslie Nielsen deserved much BETTER than this.)

9. Pippi Longstocking (Whenever I think of an unpleasant experience, this is the first film that comes to mind. The film TRIES to teach that children can be just as capable as adults, but in trying to do so, it turns the main character, who I've heard is NOT this destructive in her original books, into a pigtailed menace to society who destroys property, inspires riots in classrooms, endangers the lives and jobs of police officers, destroys the living room of a single mother and psychologically tortures her in every meaning of the word, and... on top of all that, she never gets any punishment for what she's done... One of the worst examples of a Karma Houdini character I've ever seen... In addition, the atmosphere is non-existent, I find myself siding with the villain, all the characters are annoying, the songs are lame and eargrating, and nothing makes ANY sense at all...)

8. Belle's Magical World (The absolute WORST of the Disney cheapquels, this is three poorly made tales rolled into one film. The animation is some of the WORST 2D animation I've EVER SEEN, including the infamous Belle derp face I've probably made infamous by my Animated Atrocities notepage for it, the songs are ear-grating, the new introduced characters are abysmal - and don't even follow the logic of the curse from the original film by being a book, pieces of paper, oven mittens and a pen (NOT EVERYTHING IS CURSED SERVANTS, FILM) - but worst of all... these three stories all have one horrid, irredeemable running theme - the Beast has turned into an abusive partner with no brain cells, and Belle has also lost all her brain cells, and has developed Stockholm Syndrome.... I'm NOT EVEN MAKING A JOKE HERE, one story ends with Belle apologising to Beast for calling him out on his abusive actions earlier - so it seems to be saying you should stay in an abusive relationship for the abuser's benefit... Yet another moral that could KILL someone if they followed it...)

7. Bio-Dome (Stan Helsing was a terrible stoner comedy.. but this manages to be even worse... The two main characters do nothing but screech and cause problems throughout the whole film, practically RAPE two female scientists ( this scene is horribly played for comedy, but needless to say is NOT funny at all) laugh with their annoying voices, and cost a group of scientists millions of pounds by singlehandedly destroying their experiments... Speaking of scientists, they pretty much invite these problems, as they allow them to stay in the biodome instead of simply kicking them out, and somehow, these destructive douchebags evade justice, as they never get comeuppance for their actions... I'm not really sure what else to say, except to say that this is an obnoxious, annoying, enraging mush of a film. If you can even call it that - for most of these 96 minutes, literally NOTHING happens....)

6. Kis Vuk: A Fox's Tale (Even if you haven't seen the original Vuk the Little Fox - I'll tell you right now, it doesn't do the original film justice at ALL. As well as the CGI animation being some of the absolute WORST that I have ever seen, creating that infamous broken jaw face I placed in my Animated Atrocities notepage, but the film is just so horribly annoying with constant noise throughout the entire film, and some absolutely TERRIBLE attempts at jokes – like a boar being SHOT, and showing a facial expression which looks like the writers were trying to be FUNNY while doing it – the main character from the last film being turned into a useless damsel in distress, and some absolutely terrible uncomfortable plot elements – like the disabled boy being FLUNG from his own wheelchair, his mother being crushed by the truck belonging to the villain (who is a rather obnoxious joke of a villain by the way) and the villain’s husband being a lame Jafar ripoff….. I know that I’m beginning to run out of things to say at this point – but with some of these films, they’re on this list for the same reasons as each other… But in this film’s case, it has extra negative points due to it ruining the name of it’s prequel…. In fact, considering how this film was made, it almost seems like the people who worked on this knew absolutely NOTHING about the original film – this would probably understand the absolutely TERRIBLE character derailment and lack of understanding the atmosphere of the original….)

5. The Cat in the Hat (If I told you that this film was an adaptation of a Dr Seuss film out of context, you would all probably stare at me with disturbed expressions…. For those of you who thought that The Grinch and The Lorax were bad adaptations of Dr Seuss stories, they are NOWHERE NEAR as horrible as this film here…. This film is a cautionary tale that using innuendos, adult humour, racist stereotypes and changes from the original story is NOT the way to go. True, the film may be boring, but it is still pretty horrifying to watch…. The main problem is, of course, how The Cat in the Hat himself has been portrayed…. He’s been turned into a destructive, wisecracking BULLY who isn't in the least bit charming or likeable…. He cracks horrible innuendo jokes, pukes hairballs over the two main children, threatens to KILL the dog of the main characters, pokes his butt in everyone’s faces, and even calls a garden a ‘dirty hoe’… Yeah, sounds a LOT like The Cat in the Hat, doesn’t he?! Also – the two main children are needlessly mean and horrible characters who can’t act in the slightest, ESPECIALLY the boy who says ‘I wish I had a different mom’ just because he was told to behave, the Things are… TERRIFYING, the babysitter is a racist stereotype, and…. speaking of racist stereotypes, there are a LOT of them in this film…. The jokes don’t make any sense, it shamelessly advertises Universal Studios in a contrived bit of product placement, and it’s just…. Heinously unpleasant from beginning to end… )

4. The Reef (One of the worst Disney ripoffs of all time, if not, THE worst. Yet more terrible CGI animation comes our way in this film, along with terrible voice acting, ripoffs of Finding Nemo, Shark Tale and The Karate Kid, ENDLESS amounts of gross out humour, disturbing imagery, and…. completely DISTURBING plot elements… A fish is trying to save his girlfriend from a SHARK – yeah, a shark, who is only three times the size of a FISH, is hitting on a fish….. There are horrible character designs, racist voices, problems with proportions, it zooms back and forth between scenes so quickly that I can’t keep up and…. even worst, this managed to make a SEQUEL… There are so many characters the film can't focus on giving them all distinct personalities – most of them only appear in one or two scenes and then somehow get thrown into the ending, and most of the characters are just pointless, the perspective is butchered TERRIBLY, the logic is awful, and most of the jokes are some of the WORST I've ever heard...)

3. The Nuttiest Nutcracker (Okay, even though many of the entries on this list have been badly made CGI animated films, the animation in those films have been DISNEY compared to this film….. I’m not lying when I say that this film has the absolute WORST CGI animation that I have EVER seen in my life – worse than A Fox’s Tale, worse than Elf Bowling, worse than Antz, worse than FOOD FIGHT… True, it had a budget of only $85,000, but…. that raises MORE questions. One, what the heck were the producers thinking to try to make a film with such a small budget, and TWO – it makes it even more shameful that more than 90% of the release of this film was direct to video – meaning that parents would have to WILLINGLY buy it to submit their children to the horrors within this film… This film’s horrors include, but are not limited to.. horrible writing, obscene jokes a horrible story, horrid animation, character designs and horrific imagery, MORE constant noise from beginning to end, terribly tagged on festive morals, non-existent pacing, racist stereotypes, rushed romance, horrible jokes, eargrating songs, horribly phoned in exposition, and a horribly joke of a villain…. And I actually think most of their budget went towards hiring in all of those big name actors they SOMEHOW got for this film…. Which raises even more questions…. There are just TOO many questions surrounding this film… The biggest one being… WHY?!)

2. The Wild (Wow, I never thought the day would come where this is number TWO on my least favourite films list…. While it’s not the WORST anymore, it’s a close second… Now, just for the record, I’ll say this again – this film IS in Disney’s original canon. Whenever I see DVDs of it, it says ‘Disney’s 47th Animated Classic’ on the back…. Pah! CLASSIC?! This is just a ripoff of The Lion King, Finding Nemo AND Madagascar thrown into one film…. Every character is obnoxious and lacks any sense of charisma, the voice acting is terrible, crotch gags, gross out humour and mean spirited scenes are rife, there’s NO logic, the wildebeest villains are shoehorned into the plot to have a HORRIBLE climax, the CGI tries to be like 2D animation and fails miserably to the point in which it falls DEEP into the uncanny valley, there’s risqué humour, a squirrel hitting on a giraffe, obnoxious cultural stereotypes, a hyrax on a toilet scene, charmeleons who can SOMEHOW turn things different colours by touching them (WHICH IS NOT POSSIBLE), and the wildebeests, HERBIVORES by nature, NOT being able to eat meat, wanting to become carnivores….. Dggh… Disney, WHY do you do this to me?!)

1. Eight Crazy Nights (Take every single problem I had with The Wild, Flight Before Christmas and Ren and Stimpy’s Adult Party Cartoon, compile them into one film, and crank it up tenfold… It has terribly confused morals that fail to capture the festive spirit, tons of unnecessary gross-out, HORRIBLY mean-spirited jokes, annoying songs, disturbing implications that do NOT belong in a holiday film at ALL, horrid portrayals of homosexuals, women, ethnic minorities, epileptics, diabetics, people with deformities, the obese, and the ending moral is the kind of thing that could actually get someone KILLED if they followed it to heart… Involving the main character avoiding jail after committing hundreds of crimes, endangering others, physically AND mentally tormenting Mr Whitey and being the worst kind of human being… just because he CRIES ONCE… Giving the impression that crying solves everything and you can get away with anything if you just cry once… No matter what this film WANTS to be – a comedic parody of a holiday film or a serious holiday film in its own right – it has no idea what end goal it wants to get to, has no idea how to get there, and has absolutely NO payoff for any efforts that it even ATTEMPTED to put into it…. All of the ‘jokes’ that are worked into this film are disgusting, disturbing, unpleasant, cruel and offensive, and they don’t even understand the BASICS of comedy, and it attempts so many running jokes that you can even begin to predict the punchline before the joke even arises…. And it makes an already horrible joke even WORSE…. The main characters are some of the WORST that I’ve ever seen in my life – either due to being nothing but walking punchlines or the worst kind of human being imaginable…. The voice acting and songs are terrible….. And even the animation fails, because the animation style doesn’t fit the mean-spirited tone of the film AT ALL, and just ends up pouring salt into the wounds when it works in scenes that just feel HORRIBLY out of place….. And to top it all off – there’s barely ANY reference to Christmas OR Hanukkah throughout the whole thing, and when it DOES reference the holidays it’s supposed to be representing, it’s either to work in a lazy attempt at comedy or as a scene that just feels like a last minute add-on… The three WORST scenes in the whole film are the scenes where Mr Whitey gets shoved into the portaloo by Davey and gets pushed down the cliff, gets FROZEN in excrement and left for dead, and then the reindeer LICK him out of the ice and get faeces stuck in their teeth (this scene serves absolutely purpose and is just there for one of the writers to live out their scat festish), the scene where Davey insults Mr Whitey HORRIBLY and says he has no reason to exist, and the scene where the mayor tells a horrible joke, and the reactions to it are just…. Grotesque…. But no matter how much I try to rip it apart, I don’t think I can even BEGIN to properly describe how horrible this film is…. Such is befitting of my most hated film so far…. And most likely the worst film I will ever see in my life…. )

Hopefully, the descriptions I've given make sense.... This list will most likely have some updates in the future.... Surprisingly, I find more GOOD films than bad, and I haven't been defeated by a terrible film yet, so here’s to ripping apart more terrible films in the future. :XD:


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Where would you put The Reef 2, Dominator or Where The Dead Go To Die?